Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Change of Perspective
Someone mentioned something to me today that completely changes the way I see things. In particular, relationships. =D
Monday, May 24, 2010
Things I Have Learned Since High School
Back in high school, I had absolutely no clue what I was doing. Sure, I was president of this, president of that etc etc - but really, I did it because I thought it would give me some popularity. Looking back, I'm glad I did all those things, because I learned so much from them. But the problem still remained: I had no idea what I was doing.
As college life comes to a close, I've made some thought of what are some of the lessons I've learned here in college, and hopefully, will remain with me as I grow up.
(1) Everything always changes. Always. I've learned that I may have the most wonderful plans, but these plans never work out perfectly. What this means is that I've learned the need to be flexible and adapt accordingly. Also, it means that I've to learn the lesson of letting go. That's hard. Really hard. But it's necessary.
(2) Life is always about the circumstances, so it seems, but really, you don't have to blindly follow what society dictates. In South Africa, I've had the amazing opportunity to learn from 2 of the most prominent anthropologists in the country - John & Jean Comaroff. They taught me that everything, including values, changes depending upon how forces in the society work on each other. At one point, I had given up hope, because what that meant was that there was no way we could fight against the society. How they concluded their lessons though, was what really struck me. Although society may have been shaped in a certain way by the past, we can make a difference. If each and every one of us realizes that there is something that can be better about society, we can gradually, but surely, change it. And that, has become my life goal.
(3) Humility is the best policy. Despite having been in America, where many of my friends back home believe that being confident (or even arrogant) equals success in life, I've come out believing ever more so that humility beats arrogance any day. I had an amazing time interning with Value Partners in Hong Kong. The CEO would constantly remind us: "When you think you're smart, you'll probably end up making stupid decisions. But when you think you're stupid, you'll probably end up making smart decisions." And that has stuck with me ever since. At the same time, being humble means being able to throw away my ego and accept mentors who would be willing to teach me the lessons of life. Truly, one of the main reasons why I am who I am today is because I've had so many people teaching me or saving me from periods where I've been utterly destroyed. For that, I've been truly grateful.
And so, that ends this post. Although I still don't know exactly what I'll be doing, I believe as long as I firmly stick to the lessons that life has posed for me so far, I'll end up looking back with a smile. Steve Jobs said in his Stanford graduation speech that "You can only connect the dots looking back. You cannot connect the dots looking forward." So true. You can only have faith that your dots will finally connect. At the moment, all we can do is to do our best, and to do what we love.
As college life comes to a close, I've made some thought of what are some of the lessons I've learned here in college, and hopefully, will remain with me as I grow up.
(1) Everything always changes. Always. I've learned that I may have the most wonderful plans, but these plans never work out perfectly. What this means is that I've learned the need to be flexible and adapt accordingly. Also, it means that I've to learn the lesson of letting go. That's hard. Really hard. But it's necessary.
(2) Life is always about the circumstances, so it seems, but really, you don't have to blindly follow what society dictates. In South Africa, I've had the amazing opportunity to learn from 2 of the most prominent anthropologists in the country - John & Jean Comaroff. They taught me that everything, including values, changes depending upon how forces in the society work on each other. At one point, I had given up hope, because what that meant was that there was no way we could fight against the society. How they concluded their lessons though, was what really struck me. Although society may have been shaped in a certain way by the past, we can make a difference. If each and every one of us realizes that there is something that can be better about society, we can gradually, but surely, change it. And that, has become my life goal.
(3) Humility is the best policy. Despite having been in America, where many of my friends back home believe that being confident (or even arrogant) equals success in life, I've come out believing ever more so that humility beats arrogance any day. I had an amazing time interning with Value Partners in Hong Kong. The CEO would constantly remind us: "When you think you're smart, you'll probably end up making stupid decisions. But when you think you're stupid, you'll probably end up making smart decisions." And that has stuck with me ever since. At the same time, being humble means being able to throw away my ego and accept mentors who would be willing to teach me the lessons of life. Truly, one of the main reasons why I am who I am today is because I've had so many people teaching me or saving me from periods where I've been utterly destroyed. For that, I've been truly grateful.
And so, that ends this post. Although I still don't know exactly what I'll be doing, I believe as long as I firmly stick to the lessons that life has posed for me so far, I'll end up looking back with a smile. Steve Jobs said in his Stanford graduation speech that "You can only connect the dots looking back. You cannot connect the dots looking forward." So true. You can only have faith that your dots will finally connect. At the moment, all we can do is to do our best, and to do what we love.
Monday, May 17, 2010
Slap in the Face
Got a huge slap in the face today. Painful - but necessary.
Wake up, Adrian. You've been asleep for far too long.
Wake up, Adrian. You've been asleep for far too long.
Wednesday, May 12, 2010
INFP
Weird... So after re-doing the MBTI test several times and going through numerous forums, I found out I've become an INFP. Eh?
The Idealist
As an INFP, your primary mode of living is focused internally, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit into your personal value system. Your secondary mode is external, where you take things in primarily via your intuition.
INFPs, more than other iNtuitive Feeling types, are focused on making the world a better place for people. Their primary goal is to find out their meaning in life. What is their purpose? How can they best serve humanity in their lives? They are idealists and perfectionists, who drive themselves hard in their quest for achieving the goals they have identified for themselves
INFPs are highly intuitive about people. They rely heavily on their intuitions to guide them, and use their discoveries to constantly search for value in life. They are on a continuous mission to find the truth and meaning underlying things. Every encounter and every piece of knowledge gained gets sifted through the INFP's value system, and is evaluated to see if it has any potential to help the INFP define or refine their own path in life. The goal at the end of the path is always the same - the INFP is driven to help people and make the world a better place.
Generally thoughtful and considerate, INFPs are good listeners and put people at ease. Although they may be reserved in expressing emotion, they have a very deep well of caring and are genuinely interested in understanding people. This sincerity is sensed by others, making the INFP a valued friend and confidante. An INFP can be quite warm with people he or she knows well.
INFPs do not like conflict, and go to great lengths to avoid it. If they must face it, they will always approach it from the perspective of their feelings. In conflict situations, INFPs place little importance on who is right and who is wrong. They focus on the way that the conflict makes them feel, and indeed don't really care whether or not they're right. They don't want to feel badly. This trait sometimes makes them appear irrational and illogical in conflict situations. On the other hand, INFPs make very good mediators, and are typically good at solving other people's conflicts, because they intuitively understand people's perspectives and feelings, and genuinely want to help them.
INFPs are flexible and laid-back, until one of their values is violated. In the face of their value system being threatened, INFPs can become aggressive defenders, fighting passionately for their cause. When an INFP has adopted a project or job which they're interested in, it usually becomes a "cause" for them. Although they are not detail-oriented individuals, they will cover every possible detail with determination and vigor when working for their "cause".
When it comes to the mundane details of life maintenance, INFPs are typically completely unaware of such things. They might go for long periods without noticing a stain on the carpet, but carefully and meticulously brush a speck of dust off of their project booklet.
INFPs do not like to deal with hard facts and logic. Their focus on their feelings and the Human Condition makes it difficult for them to deal with impersonal judgment. They don't understand or believe in the validity of impersonal judgment, which makes them naturally rather ineffective at using it. Most INFPs will avoid impersonal analysis, although some have developed this ability and are able to be quite logical. Under stress, it's not uncommon for INFPs to mis-use hard logic in the heat of anger, throwing out fact after (often inaccurate) fact in an emotional outburst.
INFPs have very high standards and are perfectionists. Consequently, they are usually hard on themselves, and don't give themselves enough credit. INFPs may have problems working on a project in a group, because their standards are likely to be higher than other members' of the group. In group situations, they may have a "control" problem. The INFP needs to work on balancing their high ideals with the requirements of every day living. Without resolving this conflict, they will never be happy with themselves, and they may become confused and paralyzed about what to do with their lives.
INFPs are usually talented writers. They may be awkard and uncomfortable with expressing themselves verbally, but have a wonderful ability to define and express what they're feeling on paper. INFPs also appear frequently in social service professions, such as counselling or teaching. They are at their best in situations where they're working towards the public good, and in which they don't need to use hard logic.
INFPs who function in their well-developed sides can accomplish great and wonderful things, which they will rarely give themselves credit for. Some of the great, humanistic catalysts in the world have been INFPs.
The Idealist
As an INFP, your primary mode of living is focused internally, where you deal with things according to how you feel about them, or how they fit into your personal value system. Your secondary mode is external, where you take things in primarily via your intuition.
INFPs, more than other iNtuitive Feeling types, are focused on making the world a better place for people. Their primary goal is to find out their meaning in life. What is their purpose? How can they best serve humanity in their lives? They are idealists and perfectionists, who drive themselves hard in their quest for achieving the goals they have identified for themselves
INFPs are highly intuitive about people. They rely heavily on their intuitions to guide them, and use their discoveries to constantly search for value in life. They are on a continuous mission to find the truth and meaning underlying things. Every encounter and every piece of knowledge gained gets sifted through the INFP's value system, and is evaluated to see if it has any potential to help the INFP define or refine their own path in life. The goal at the end of the path is always the same - the INFP is driven to help people and make the world a better place.
Generally thoughtful and considerate, INFPs are good listeners and put people at ease. Although they may be reserved in expressing emotion, they have a very deep well of caring and are genuinely interested in understanding people. This sincerity is sensed by others, making the INFP a valued friend and confidante. An INFP can be quite warm with people he or she knows well.
INFPs do not like conflict, and go to great lengths to avoid it. If they must face it, they will always approach it from the perspective of their feelings. In conflict situations, INFPs place little importance on who is right and who is wrong. They focus on the way that the conflict makes them feel, and indeed don't really care whether or not they're right. They don't want to feel badly. This trait sometimes makes them appear irrational and illogical in conflict situations. On the other hand, INFPs make very good mediators, and are typically good at solving other people's conflicts, because they intuitively understand people's perspectives and feelings, and genuinely want to help them.
INFPs are flexible and laid-back, until one of their values is violated. In the face of their value system being threatened, INFPs can become aggressive defenders, fighting passionately for their cause. When an INFP has adopted a project or job which they're interested in, it usually becomes a "cause" for them. Although they are not detail-oriented individuals, they will cover every possible detail with determination and vigor when working for their "cause".
When it comes to the mundane details of life maintenance, INFPs are typically completely unaware of such things. They might go for long periods without noticing a stain on the carpet, but carefully and meticulously brush a speck of dust off of their project booklet.
INFPs do not like to deal with hard facts and logic. Their focus on their feelings and the Human Condition makes it difficult for them to deal with impersonal judgment. They don't understand or believe in the validity of impersonal judgment, which makes them naturally rather ineffective at using it. Most INFPs will avoid impersonal analysis, although some have developed this ability and are able to be quite logical. Under stress, it's not uncommon for INFPs to mis-use hard logic in the heat of anger, throwing out fact after (often inaccurate) fact in an emotional outburst.
INFPs have very high standards and are perfectionists. Consequently, they are usually hard on themselves, and don't give themselves enough credit. INFPs may have problems working on a project in a group, because their standards are likely to be higher than other members' of the group. In group situations, they may have a "control" problem. The INFP needs to work on balancing their high ideals with the requirements of every day living. Without resolving this conflict, they will never be happy with themselves, and they may become confused and paralyzed about what to do with their lives.
INFPs are usually talented writers. They may be awkard and uncomfortable with expressing themselves verbally, but have a wonderful ability to define and express what they're feeling on paper. INFPs also appear frequently in social service professions, such as counselling or teaching. They are at their best in situations where they're working towards the public good, and in which they don't need to use hard logic.
INFPs who function in their well-developed sides can accomplish great and wonderful things, which they will rarely give themselves credit for. Some of the great, humanistic catalysts in the world have been INFPs.
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
Jerry's Emo Song
I love this song. Never knew the original was Japanese. Was shocked to find out yesterday. Nao - you, Jerry and I are gonna pump this song at maximum volume at the KTV - both in Japanese and Chinese!
Look, do you see what's at your feet?
This is the road you walk on
Look do you see what's up ahead?
That is your future...
My mother showed me so much tenderness
Telling me again and again, to walk on with love
I was too young then to understand what she meant
But she still took my hand and walked together with me...
My dreams always seems so far away in the sky
I'm afraid I'll never reach it, but I'll keep chasing it
Since this is my story, I don't want to give up
You held my hand when I was scared
and walked together with me
At times I hated that tenderness and let go,
not listening to my mom...
Look, do you see what's at your feet?
This is the road you walk on
Look do you see what's up ahead?
That is your future...
At times i hated that tenderness and let go,
not listening to my mom...
Look, do you see what's at your feet?
This is the road you walk on
Look do you see what's up ahead?
That is your future...
Look, do you see what's at your feet?
This is the road you walk on
Look do you see what's up ahead?
That is your future...
Turn to the future and let's walk there one step at a time
Look, do you see what's at your feet?
This is the road you walk on
Look do you see what's up ahead?
That is your future...
My mother showed me so much tenderness
Telling me again and again, to walk on with love
I was too young then to understand what she meant
But she still took my hand and walked together with me...
My dreams always seems so far away in the sky
I'm afraid I'll never reach it, but I'll keep chasing it
Since this is my story, I don't want to give up
You held my hand when I was scared
and walked together with me
At times I hated that tenderness and let go,
not listening to my mom...
Look, do you see what's at your feet?
This is the road you walk on
Look do you see what's up ahead?
That is your future...
At times i hated that tenderness and let go,
not listening to my mom...
Look, do you see what's at your feet?
This is the road you walk on
Look do you see what's up ahead?
That is your future...
Look, do you see what's at your feet?
This is the road you walk on
Look do you see what's up ahead?
That is your future...
Turn to the future and let's walk there one step at a time
Sunday, May 9, 2010
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