Tuesday, October 5, 2010

(2) Make Peace with Imperfection

As I go through the recruiting process, it's so easy to find myself falling into a trap of expecting myself to be perfect. Frankly, doing that just takes up so much mental energy. Every time I fall into that trap, I find myself drained so quickly. This chapter really reminds me how it's alright to NOT be perfect, but still do well in whatever we do.

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I've yet to meet an absolute perfectionist whose life was filled with inner peace. The need for perfection and the desire for inner tranquility conflict with each other. Whenever we are attached to having something in a certain way, better than it already is, we are, almost by definition, engaged in a losing battle. Rather than being content and grateful for what we have, we are focused on what's wrong with something and our need to fix it. When we are zeroed in on what's wrong, it implies that we are dissatisfied, discontent.

Whether it's related to ourselves - a disorganized closet, a scratch on the car, an imperfect accomplishment, a few pound we would like to lose - or someone else's "imperfections" - the way someone looks, behaves, or lives their life - the very act of focusing on imperfection pulls us away of our goal of being kind and gentle. This strategy has nothing to do with ceasing to do your very best but with being overly attached and focused on what's wrong with life. It's about realizing that while there's always a better way to do something, this doesn't mean you can't enjoy and appreciate the way things already are.

The solution here is to catch yourself when you fall into your habit of insisting that things should be other than they are. Gently remind yourself that life is okay the way it is, right now. In the absence of your judgment, everything would be fine. As you begin to eliminate your need for perfection in all areas of your life, you'll begin to discover the perfection in life itself.

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